God Made Me An Atheist

Great Britain Is Great

I'm British so I laughed when I saw this.

Judaism

Atheist Kitty Reading The DOG Delusion

I've had a bit of a Cat theme today

Atheist Cat

This follows on from the previous post.

Catholic Kittens

One day a Catholic Priest was walking down the street and saw a little girl on her front porch with a box of newborn kittens.
The little girl greeted him, "Hello Father; these are Catholic kittens."
The Priest replied, "That's nice. Bless you child."
A week later the Priest saw the little girl again with the box of kittens and asked, "How are the little Catholic kittens doing?"
The little girl solemnly informed him, "They are not Catholic kittens anymore, they are Atheist kittens now."
The Priest was shocked, "What happened?!"
The little girl grinned, "Their eyes opened."

Is Jesus Pinocchio?

Saint Peter is watching the gates of Heaven, but he really has to go to the bathroom. He asks Jesus to watch the gates for a few minutes, and Jesus agrees.

As Jesus is standing there, he sees an old man leading a donkey up from Earth to Heaven. He notices the old man has carpenter's tools with him. When the old man gets to the gates, Jesus asks him to describe his life and explain why he feels he should be admitted into Heaven.

The man explains, "In English, my name would be Joseph, but I didn't live in America or England. I lived a modest life, making things out of wood. I'm not remembered very well by most people, but almost everyone has heard of my son. I call him my son, but I was more of a Dad to him -- he really didn't come into this world in the usual way.

I sent my son out to be among the people of the World. He was ridiculed by many, and was even known to associate himself with some pretty unsavory characters, although he himself tried to be honest and perfect. My single biggest reason for trying to get into Heaven is to be re-united with my son."

Jesus is awe-struck by the man's story. He looks into the old man's eyes and asks, "Father?"

The old man's face brightens; he looks at Jesus, and asks, "Pinocchio?"